See bottom of page for actual tribute to Charlton Heston (2008) The rest of the content of this page was made in 2000. Our policy is strict: We only dishonor the dead before they die. After they're actually dead, we're much easier on them.

Click here for other Heston feature "Good Riddance, Charlton - Peeing on His Grave"

Sadness grips all of us at Charlton Heston's untimely passing. A pall is cast over our great nation.

Charlton Heston Killed Tragically shot as he greets fellow NRA gun supporters CHARLOTTE, N.C. — Beloved Hollywood actor and outspoken NRA President Charlton Heston is dead, the victim of a series of gunshots at the organization's annual convention. Heston had stepped away from security officials and walked out on the verandah when the shots rang out. Friends and associates immediately huddled around him and tried to help as he lay bleeding. Witnesses pointed police in the direction where the gunshots came from. There was confusion, however, as each pointed a different direction. As of Monday no suspect had been named or arrested, and clues were few. The best clue seems to be the report of a black van with the letters "ATF" on its side speeding from the area, but as of now no one knows what that means. Police spokesman Tony Guinn told reporters during his news conference: "Frankly, we're very busy. This will just have to wait its turn." Heston made a name for himself in films, coming on the scene sometime between the 1930s and the 1950s. He starred in such film successes as Soylent Green, Ben Hur (we think), the Planet of the Apes series, and The Ten Commandments. Heston's portrayal of the peyote-chewing Hebrew mystic Moses was perhaps his most memorable role, lifting Cecil B. DeMille's low-budget bomb and helping it finally to turn a profit. With Heston's death comes many questions. Do guns kill people? Do people kill people? Or would he just have easily met his demise by a knife or poisoned drink at the hands of a crazed rhesus monkey? Would a safety lock have prevented the killer or killers from being able to shoot their gun or guns? One critic of the NRA and guns spoke what was on many minds: "Isn't it ironic, this man crusaded for guns and it turns out he's the victim of one!" (See editorial below, where we work with this fascinating irony.) As Heston was heavily involved in politics, comments came from both parties, each sharing in the sorrow. Vice President Al Gore, a constant whipping-boy for Heston and the NRA, said, "Tipper and I share the sorrow of a saddened nation with the passing of Charlton Heston. Although we were often on different sides of important issues, we respected one another deeply." Republican presidential candidate George W. Bush emerged bleary-eyed with a touching statement prepared by his handlers, and in his fine reading of it showed that the coaching is paying off nicely: "Laura and I are deeply saddened at the passing of Charlton Heston. We have lost a great friend, a great American, and a possible running-mate. I very much had looked forward to sharing my office with him." President Clinton also expressed his usual sadness spiel, then immediately called on Congress for increased restrictions on guns, this time proposing to remove triggers from guns altogether.

Morgue Pictures Prying the gun from Heston's cold, dead fingers Before Charlton Heston's death, one of the convention's most dramatic and memorable moments was when he heroically raised a gun over his head and taunted the government, in particular Al Gore. Heston thrilled the NRA crowd when he proclaimed, "They will take my gun away only when they pry it from my cold, dead fingers!" The place erupted with that great remark, and of course Heston basked in the glow and support and oneness of feeling that surged through the hall. What a terrible task it was, then, when Charlton Heston himself was the victim of gun violence only about an hour after this great proclamation, to try to take the gun away. Because as the actor lay dying, clinging to life, he clung even harder to the gun, perhaps still mindful of his last wonderful soundbite. Finally, police out of respect for his dying-wish left the gun in his cooling, dying fingers. It was up to the "boys at the morge" later to actually pry it from his by-then cold, dead fingers. WARNING: The pictures that follow are somewhat graphic. The "boys at the morge" pried off the thumb first, then took a picture of it. Then they pried off the index finger, took a picture, etc., etc. Comments from the "Boys at the Morgue" "His fingers weren't really that much colder than the average stiff." "It really wasn't all that hard to pry 'em off. You know, he was dead. He didn't put up much of a fuss after that." "Why would a dead guy still be holding a gun? Kind of weird." "Hey, this gun isn't even loaded."

Tribute to Charlton You walked proud and tall, and you always told it like it is. No one dare deny that it's so. You had big dreams that you'd go far. And you did, you went all the way into our hearts. You showed us greatness in each film. Your way was always the best. We'll watch you now with tears. And then you stood up and were counted on guns, and as it turns out, this is what brought you down.

Editorial: "Whoa" Do Guns Kill People? Or Do People Kill People? The questions have already started up: Would a safety lock have prevented the death of Charlton Heston? If there had been mandatory gun safety education would the killer or killers have known better? From coast to coast, the cries are being heard or soon will make themselves heard. Those who are against guns will say, "Guns kill people." And those who believe just the opposite will point out that, "People kill people. They just happen to use guns 99% of the time." Our own stand on this is one that we feel is grounded in common sense and finds its place in between the two extremes: "We don't know what or who kills people. But we believe that time will tell." One thing we can state unequivocally is that the world lost a great man and a great actor when Charlton Heston went down. And as aforementioned, whatever position you take on guns and violence, we again note the interesting irony, that a gun supporter who was so staunch on the issue should himself be the victim of gun violence! That's like being a bartender and then on the way home being run over by a drunk driver served at your own bar. It's like, whoa!

Actual Charlton Heston tribute (2008): Charlton Heston was a great actor and a man passionate for what he believed in. He was a really great figure on the public stage. I don't see many movies but I've seen The Ten Commandments at least eight or 10 times. And Heston played a great Moses. In fact it's hard to read the actual Bible stories of the real Moses without picturing Charlton Heston. Now that Charlton Heston is in heaven, it ought to be interesting if he sees Moses, and maybe gets two thumbs up! But maybe Moses will tell him, concerning the special effects in the movie, it was a little overdone.

Thanks for buying lots of books. You're keeping us in some very rich clover! BACK TO INDEX PAGE ©2000 NegativeSpin.com E-Mail: tom@hauntedbookstore.com 5-28-2000